Tired

I am tired
Tired of being a woman
Who doesn’t find herself
Attractive anymore
(So why would anyone else?)
Tired of waiting
For that one look
Of appreciation
And acknowledgment
Of my feminity
Or my silent efforts.
Tired of being a provider
Whose needs are never met
Tired of scrimping and saving
For rainy days that loom large
All the time and never seem to end
Tired of holding it all together
When my own fiber is
Crumbling bit by bit.
Tired of living each day
Thinking that the next will be better
(It never is!)
Tired of telling people to be positive
When all that I want to do
Is to curl up and die.
Tired of being alone, friendless
With no goals and no hopes
Tired of relentlessly fighting
For existence…….